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Them dodgy US covers by UK artists there [The Risk - "Peaches & Cream" + more]

Maaaaaaaaaaate. Actually, let me tell you what (initially) inspired this post. JLS break up. "Devastating news I didn't see coming" - said no one. We knew it was curtains when we heard their "Hottest Girl In The World" song. You know the knock-off Justin Timberlake sounding song? Pretty rubbish, but all the urbanites like it because it sounded, like, an erm, Justin Timberlake song from back in the day. Worst thing is Justin Bieber pulled the exact same stunt a few months earlier ("Boyfriend") so it was a knock-off Justin Bieber, knocking off Justin Timberlake. New thing is "Just because it sounds familiar, doesn't mean it's good".

Pretty bad, isn't it? Problem is I can see a bunch of Sony a&r's, marketing dept. and general suits, (well they wear trendy gear now, but you know who I mean) sat bumping their heads slightly off-beat, slight foot tap before saying "This sounds really edgy and current for JLS. Justin Bieber released something just like this. R&B is coming back now." The points are kinda on point, except the song. The song is not good. That's what matters.

But anyway, the reason I post this today is because fellow X-Factor boy group contestants, The Risk, decided to cover 112's classic dancefloor filler "Peaches & Cream". Admittedly, it became a very predictable song in clubs. Always followed by Jagged Edge "Where The Party At?" alas a staple in the DJ box and definitely an untouchable song. Their first song "Missiles" flopped so this is definitely desperate times = "Hey, let's cover a song that's already been big. We'll get a hit"

Listen to their attempted murder take on the classic below.

Was it worth it? Really?

Anyway, thought I'd go on a journey of other "Who on your team said this was a good idea? Let me 'ave 'im?! C'mon!" covers. Sadly, most of them went to #1. It's times like those I despair for the British buying public's ears.

Stooshe - "Waterfalls" - #21 in November 2012

London girl group Stooshe covered the biggest TLC song ever. Thankfully, they were wise enough to hold their hands up and admit it wasn't good. Nothing more to say there. Oh the rap was pretty cool.

Mis-Teeq "Roll On/ This Is How We Do It" #7 in June 2002

 Then I remembered Mis-Teeq created a mash-up of Montell Jordan's "This Is How We Do It" and (dunno where the original comes from, but...) Big Pun ft. Joe "Still Not A Player"

Oh man. Why?! To be fair, worse is still to come. Thought I'd let you in with a gentle stroke.

Another Level - "Freak Me" #1 in July 1998

Next song I remembered, Another Level - "Freak Me". This song offended me, but not as much as other songs to follow. UK pop boyband covering a genuine classic '90s slow jam by Silk before it even left our conscious mind (originally released in 1992). Didn't know Keith Sweat co-wrote and co-produced it until now, but I'm not surprised. The chorus is him bang on. This second release by the equal opportunities abiding boy group's became their first #1 single. Original didn't chart in the UK. So, maybe it was a blessing for the song. I dunno.

I'm not gonna lie though, as I listen to it now it doesn't sound as bad as I remembered. Actually, I'm listening again, the chorus is decent, the verses are horrible.

Blue - "Too Close" #1 August 2001

Now, if the above was covered too early, this one takes the mick. The original by r&b group Next topped the Billboard Hot 100 chart in 1998 - Blue covered it in 2001. And unlike Silk "Freak Me" it charted in the UK, peaking at #24. I wanted to punch someone for this. Hated Blue for a while due to this crime. They had no right.

Once again, second single produced their first chart-topper. Weird similarity to Another Level, but I've always kinda thought they were Another Level 2.0.

Blazing Squad - "Crossroads" #1 in August 2002

If the above made we want to punch someone, this one had me dreaming I'd catch members slipping. We used to have convo's in school about catching the slipping. I obviously didn't partake in the conversations about "eats" and "striping them puxxyholes" 'cos I'm not really that kinda guy.

These guys were serial classic killers. Let's not forget they sampled Zapp & Rodger "Computer Love" on "Reminisce"

Billie Piper - G.H.E.T.T.O.U.T - B-side on debut single "Because We Want To"

You probably didn't even know the former Doctor Who assistant's cover of this mid-90s r&b classic existed. Neither did I until I spotted it on Spotify last year when searching for the original. Bruv, who the hell let her cover this?! Total insult. I understand she was  young at the time, but someone should've been wise enough to know "Someone's tell me some boot is going down" isn't an acceptable radio edit of bullsh!t. "Bull" or nothing.

Just read this was the B-side on her debut single "Because We Want To" which went to #1 when she was younger than 16 (can't remember if she was 14 or 15 but she was the youngest female artist to debut at #1). I hope Changing Faces were compensated appropriately for this travesty.

She must cringe at her music now, boy lol.

Also, just seen she covered reggae vocal group's The Paragon's "The Tide Is High". This was scheduled to be her fourth single from second album. Thankfully it wasn't released as she took a break from music following court case against some stalker chick. Get in!

Sounds strangely similar to the Atomic Kitten song released a couple years later. Hmm...

If you can think of any I've missed, feel free to comment or @ me on Twitter (@MarvinSparks). That doesn't include all the UK Rap stuff over American hip hop beats or the numerous UK rappers using Meek Mill's flow. Singles only. Thanks in advance.


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